


I'm not as grim as I seem.

by telescopefever



Category: SEVENTEEN (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Fantasy, Awkward Sexual Situations, Chwe Hansol | Vernon Being An Idiot, Death, Demiromantic Wonwoo, Demisexual Wonwoo, First Kiss, Grim Reapers, Grim reaper Wonwoo, Human Vernon, Humor, Lingerie, M/M, Strangers to Friends
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-02
Updated: 2020-07-24
Packaged: 2021-03-04 02:13:27
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 7
Words: 7,932
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24505981
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/telescopefever/pseuds/telescopefever
Summary: Vernon meets the Grim Reaper.
Relationships: Chwe Hansol | Vernon/Jeon Wonwoo
Comments: 13
Kudos: 77





	1. Ten

“ _ Oh my god _ .” 

Wonwoo sighs. He got caught. “This isn’t what it looks like.

He turns. 

There’s a boy holding a cat up to his chest and his eyes are wide. 

“You’re telling me,” The boy clutches the cat closer to his chest. “that you’re not trying to clear all this up?” He gestures to the floor. 

Wonwoo isn’t surprised. “No.” He says blankly, even though it was exactly what he was doing. “I wasn’t.” 

“I saw your  _ voo-doo  _ magic.” He tells Wonwoo, taking a brave step closer. “You can’t fool me.” 

Wonwoo quirks an eyebrow. That’s new. 

“What’s your name again?” Wonwoo asks. 

The boy gives Wonwoo a look over. “I’m not telling you.” He scoffs. 

“Look-“ Wonwoo tries to take a step forward but the cat in the boy’s arms hisses. That never happens. Cats  _ love  _ him. 

“She hissed at you.” 

“I know.” Wonwoo frowns. “Why?” 

“Because she  _ knows _ .” 

Wonwoo rolls his eyes. All he wants to do is gather this body up and leave. Why is it becoming more and more of a difficult task? 

He attempts to take another step closer and the cat struggles and must have scratched or bit the boy’s hands because he yelps and his arms loosen and the cat jumps and runs away. 

“ _ Petal _ .” The boy says mournfully. “She left me.” 

Wonwoo notices the clothes the boy wears and how he has a little name tag on his breast pocket. 

_ Vernon.  _

“Are you gonna tell me what you were doing now?” 

“Hmm.” Wonwoo pretends to think and nudges his glasses up the bridge of his nose. “No.” 

Vernon pouts. “ _ Why? _ I found you.” 

“It’ll get complicated if I tell you and I  _ really  _ don’t want to fill the paperwork out.” 

“You guys have  _ paperwork _ ?” 

Wonwoo rolls his eyes at Vernon’s naive question. “Don’t you have paperwork here as well?” He says. 

“Aha!” The curly haired boy points at him. “You  _ aren’t from here _ ! I  _ knew  _ it!” 

“I didn’t say anything-” 

“No no, you did.” Vernon paces. “You said,  _ here _ . Therefore suggesting you aren’t from  _ here _ .” 

“Maybe I meant I wasn’t from Seoul.” Wonwoo tried to stop the nervousness from creeping into his voice. 

“I don’t buy it.” Vernon shakes his head. “ _ Please _ \- You’re like, my favourite dude out there.” 

“I’m a fantasy story.” 

“Not really.” 

Wonwoo gives him a dirty look. The boy had enough respect to look embarrassed. 

“The real question should be, why are you lingering so close to a dead body?” Wonwoo says after a few moments. That ought to throw him off. 

“Cause, I knew you would come here eventually.” 

“How do I know you didn’t kill him?” 

Vernon rolls his eyes. “I think being the  _ grim reaper _ , you would know who kills who.” 

Wonwoo hums. 

“Can you tell me how he died Mr. Grim Reaper?” Vernon begs, tone higher and cuter and it made Wonwoo’s mouth taste bitter. “Please?” 

“Overdose.” Wonwoo says simply. He’s given up trying to hide who he was from this irritatingly stubborn boy. “He died five minutes ago but since you’ve been here,  _ stalling me _ , it’s been a good fifteen.” 

“Sorry.” 

Wonwoo softens at the guilty look that rises from Vernon’s face. 

They stand silently for a while and Wonwoo looks calculatingly at the harmless boy before turning back round and doing his work. 

He stands with his fingertips touching each other and he mutters strange words that even he doesn’t know how he’s learnt and he can practically hear the boy creeping up behind him. 

“Vernon.” 

The boy freezes. “Why do you know my name?!” 

Wonwoo wants to laugh at him. He doesn’t. “I know the names of people who try to stalk me. Consider yourself lucky.” 

“No way!” Vernon gasps, but not from horror like Wonwoo has suspected. More in the way of succeeding from being on Wonwoo’s made up  _ stalker list _ . 

Wonwoo sighs and he turns back to his work and he closes his eyes for good measure but that doesn’t quieten the way the gravel crumbles under the soles of Vernon’s feet. 

The last bits of the unfortunate soul gets sucked up in the air and drifts freely and glimmering before slowly vanishing. 

“Oh  _ sweet _ .” Vernon breathes and Wonwoo flinches because the boy is  _ too close  _ and Wonwoo isn’t really used to the heat humans emit. 

“Right.” Wonwoo drawls. “You’ve seen my  _ magic trick _ . It’s past your sleeping hour. Time to run back to your little human cocoon.” 

Vernon folds his arms across his chest. “I don’t have a bedtime.” He says defensively. “And it’s called a  _ bed _ .” 

Wonwoo waves it off. “I don’t care. I’m leaving now. Don’t try to find me again.” He warns. 

“But you didn’t tell me your name.” Vernon whines. “You found mine out but you didn’t tell me your name. That’s not  _ fair _ .” 

Wonwoo pushes his hair back. “Okay.” He has come to a conclusion that this boy was harmless. 

“I don’t want to keep calling you Mr. Grim Reaper.” Vernon begins to chatter without giving Wonwoo another second to deliver an answer. “It’s too long and it’s not very nice.” 

“Wonwoo.” Wonwoo finally says. He has a headache so he shuts his eyes. “My name is not Mr. Grim Reaper. It’s Wonwoo.” 


	2. Seventeen

Vernon was eleven when he first met Mr. Grim Reaper AKA Wonwoo hyung. 

Granted, it wasn’t the best situation for an eleven years old to be in. 

First, his parents would have  _ killed  _ him if they found out. 

Second, seeing a dead body for the first time is not great. But Vernon had always been a bit weirder than the other kids when he was younger and he saw his grandad die so, there’s not much of a difference for an eleven years old.

Third, meeting the grim reaper before he dies mustn't be great. He could’ve been dreaming- or that’s what the adults told him when he showed him his crayon drawings. 

It doesn’t matter. Vernon had hung them up happily anyway. His parents watched with teasing smiles and nod when Vernon chitters about how Mr. Grim Reaper, Wonwoo hyung, is his best friend. He said he was going to  _ marry  _ him one day. 

His father chuckled and ruffled his hair and told him he had an active imagination. 

Vernon still scribbled on the little slips of paper.  _ Mr. Grim Reaper,  _ it said,  _ Wonwoo hyung,  _ it said. There was a pretty pink heart circling his name with Vernon’s. 

He’s seventeen and it’s still around his room somewhere, in one of those boxes filled with stacks of paper that have sentimental value. 

There hasn’t been many days where Vernon hadn’t thought about his grim reaper. 

He doesn’t necessarily  _ seek out  _ death, it just  _ happens  _ to follow him around. 

For example, he sees dead birds everywhere. Ones that have been run over and he looks up into the air and he thinks that when he squints he can see the little sparkles of their souls leaving the world. 

He’s walked past so many homeless people that he wasn’t able to give his spare change to, to freeze from the cold and he had once sprinted towards the dark shape that leaned over a body. 

It had vanished before he could get there. 

But Vernon swears it was  _ his  _ Wonwoo hyung. 

The next time he sees a dead person, it’s at the hospital his mum works at. 

It wasn’t like he was purposely hanging around some guy he thought was going to die. 

But he passed by a room where he could hear the heart monitor flatline and how the nurses and doctors rushed around and how someone yells, “One, two, three, clear!” and the sound of defibrillator going off. 

She doesn’t make it. 

Vernon leans against the door when the nurses leave, bustling out and once they’re gone he peeks through and- 

“Wonwoo hyung!” He calls. 

The tall dark man flinches. “What the  _ fuck _ ?” 

He turns and he’s more handsome than Vernon had remembered him to be. 

The grim reaper doesn’t recognise him and Vernon knows it’s  _ definitely  _ Wonwoo hyung he’s looking at because he’s dreamt of that face for years. 

“It’s me.” Vernon swallows down the bitter lump in his throat. “It’s Vernon.” 

“How can you  _ see  _ me?” Wonwoo says exasperatedly. “After our little run in I’ve made sure to turn this thing on.” 

“What?” 

“You’re not supposed to see me.” 

“Maybe it’s cause I already saw you.” 

Wonwoo thinks for a while. 

“You’ve grown.” He eventually says. 

Vernon puffs his chest out. “I’m seventeen now.” 

“Congratulations.” 

“Thanks!” Vernon beams. “How have you been?” 

Wonwoo had been trying to continue his enchantment but his hands stutter. “How have I been?” He says it with unfamiliarity. 

“Yeah.” Vernon rocks on the heels of his feet. “I’ve been wondering.” 

“No one has ever wondered.” 

“I do.” Vernon admits. “I have been for the past six years.”

“Impossible.” Wonwoo delates and he turns his back on Vernon, but Vernon is stubborn; He won’t back down. 

“So…?” Vernon asks again. “How  _ have  _ you been?” 

“I haven’t been anything.” Wonwoo tells Vernon, annoyed. “I’ve been here and there. I’m not anything.” 

“Everyone is something.” Vernon says and Wonwoo thinks about the last time he saw the boy. He remembers. It was a long time ago but it was the only interaction he’s had with human beings. He hadn’t remembered Vernon to be so pressing. 

“Perhaps I’m not.” Wonwoo finally decides to say. “Perhaps I’m just a figment and you’re the unlucky human whose primary role in their existence is to torment me.” 

“That’s mean.” Vernon says, crossing his arms. 

Wonwoo ignores the guilt and pushes it down in his stomach. He focuses back on sending the spirit away. 

Then he feels something he’s never felt before. 

Something Grim Reapers  _ aren’t  _ supposed to feel. 

Life. 

“Don’t touch!” Wonwoo yells and he snatches his hand away from Vernon’s touch. 

The teenager had slipped his hand into Wonwoo’s and it caused a spark of sweetness up the cavern of Wonwoo’s mouth. 

“Nothing happened!” Vernon frowned but he backed away nonetheless. 

Wonwoo put his hand on his chest as he caught his racing heart. (if he did have a heart anyway) “Don’t do that again.” He manages to pant out. “Don’t.”

“But-”

“Don’t argue with me!” 

Vernon flinches. “But nothing happened…” He says in a small voice and it made Wonwoo feel very unpleasant. 

“Urgh.” Wonwoo grimances. “Now I feel weirder.” 

Vernon stays silent and he refuses to look at Wonwoo. 

“What?” Wonwoo glares. “Now you won’t look at me?” 

Vernon pointedly turns his gaze to the ceiling. He was ignoring him. He was being irrationally mean again. 

Wonwoo groans and tries to concentrate but it proves to be a lot more difficult than he had anticipated it to be. 

It takes longer,  _ too much  _ longer to release the soul and he can feel Vernon’s curious gaze burning into his back. Vernon watches as he staggers back a bit when the little shimmery flakes dissipate into the air and he moves quickly enough to be there to support him. 

Wonwoo doesn’t move away fast enough and the boy’s touch burns through his thin black robes. Vernon is a lot taller now. He now reached up to Wonwoo’s shoulder and was able to place both his hands on his back and chest to catch him. 

“Woah! Are you okay hyung?” Vernon asks and he doesn’t let up his touch and Wonwoo shivers and swallows down the sweet taste in his mouth. 

“What did I say?” Wonwoo answers with instead, pursing his lips. 

Vernon didn’t pay him any attention. He had brushed away stray hairs from Wonwoo’s eyes. “You look tired.” Vernon states instead. 

“I’m fine.” Wonwoo says gruffly. “You can stop touching me now.” 

“What if you fall?” 

“Then I fall.” 

Vernon frowns. “That’s not a very healthy mindset.”

“It’s not supposed to be.”

Vernon lets go of him anyway. 

“No one is here.” He tells Wonwoo looking around and peeking out of the door when Wonwoo brushes the invisible lint and dust off his clothes. 

“Yeah. I slowed time down a bit in here.”

“Wow!” Vernon exclaimed, twisting around excitedly. “You can do that now?” 

“I can do many things now.”

“Did you know the last time I saw you?” 

Wonwoo scoffs. “What when you were eight? No. That was years ago. I’ve learnt a few tricks now. To make sure  _ that  _ didn’t happen again.”

“You don’t like meeting people.” 

“What gave it away?” Wonwoo asks sarcastically. “It doesn’t matter. I should get going anyway.”

“Will I see you again?”

“Me?” That was a stupid question to ask. “Hopefully not. At least not in with my willing consent.”

“I like you very much Wonwoo hyung.” Vernon admits, twisting his fingers together. 

Wonwoo barely spares him a glance. “Is that so?” He says just to entertain the boy.

“Yeah…” Vernon mumbles. “Could- Can we see each other again? Please?”

Wonwoo rolls his eyes and makes the mistake of looking up into Vernon’s deep brown eyes. “Fine.” It slips out of Wonwoo and he winces but he can’t take it back. Not when there’s a gigantic gummy smile spread across Vernon’s face.

“Really?” Vernon asks, shuffling closer. 

Wonwoo grumbles. “Ask me again and I might change my mind.” He says. Then he leaves as if he was never there. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading! 
> 
> comments and kudos are very much appreciated! i want to know what you think about it so far!


	3. Twenty

He’s twenty and he’s got a year left of university before his life is over. 

Over as in, Vernon has to find a job and give up looking at maps of the different ley lines and talking to psychics who never really help but tell him a vague half-assed description of his future. 

_ “You are desperately searching for a long lost loved one.”  _ They said. Yeah. Like no shit. 

It doesn’t matter anyway. 

Vernon looks up at his map and if his navigations have been right… this  _ should  _ be where most leylines intersect in South Korea. 

Pursing his lips, he gets to work, dumping his bag on the floor and taking out five flat stones. Shame, he thinks to himself, they would have made great rocks to skid on the water. 

He takes his compass out and isn’t surprised by how much the arrow is turning rapidly around the device. Vernon’s been to enough ley lines that it doesn’t come to much of a surprise. 

Staring intently, he trips his way to where the compass seems most disturbed and if his research is right, this would be the most irregular place in South Korea to be in. Spiritually. Loads of freaky shit happen where the ley lines run. 

Vernon places the rocks down in a neat circle and sighs. Now he needs an offering. 

Looking down at the grass, he looks to seemingly stare at nothing but no- he’s trying to find a sacrificial offering, he’s looking to find… 

An ant. 

“Gotcha.” He whispers, despite there being no people, despite being in the middle of nowhere. 

Vernon admits to himself that, yeah, it’s pretty stupid to go offer up an  _ ant  _ out of all things but he’s not going to kill a bird for this, or anything else and an ant seemed like the most plausible possible thing he could morally do. 

He puts the ant in the middle of the circle of stones and drags his bag over as he kneels on the dry grass. 

The shiny silver of the knife glints in the sunlight. 

He takes a deep breath and holds his palm out and it’s coming down onto his skin and Vernon can’t believe he’s doing this and he feels so stupid because if Wonwoo doesn’t get here, he’s going to hurt himself for no reason. 

“What do you think you’re doing?” A flat voice interrupts him and Vernon breathes a sigh of relief. 

It’s Wonwoo. 

“Oh thank god.” Vernon moans and he falls backwards so he’s facing the sky and Wonwoo wordlessly looks down on him. “I was about to chicken out there.” 

“Why were you about to cut yourself?” 

“To see you.” 

“It hasn’t been long since I’ve seen you. You couldn’t possibly have missed me.”

“Excuse you!” Vernon says exasperated. “It’s been three years for me!” 

Wonwoo shrugs and his back must be getting tired from looking at Vernon because he sits down, crossing his legs. 

“I didn’t realise.”

Vernon huffs. The knife lies limply in his hand. 

Wonwoo lets out a sudden bark of laughter and he jerks. 

“Were you seriously going to give a dead  _ ant  _ as a sacrificial gift for me?”

Vernon frowns. “It’s the best I could do.”

“No.” Wonwoo disagrees. “The best you could’ve done was fetch me a bird or squirrel. An ant brings great disrespect to us.”

“Oh shit.” Vernon shoots up from the ground. “I’m so sorry, I didn’t mean for it to be- I, uh, I don’t like dead things? I knew I should’ve brought one of the fish from the market back home but I didn’t really want to lug around a stinky dead fish in my backpack, no offence.” He rambles. 

Wonwoo makes no move to stop him from talking. He just watches with amusement. 

Vernon takes notices, catches his eye and frowns. “What?” He says, feeling self-conscious all of a sudden.

“Nothing.” Wonwoo tells him, straight faced. “I was just listening. You were going to bring me a fish?” 

“The thought had crossed my mind.” Vernon admits. “But sorry to disappoint, I didn’t.”

The crickets chirp. 

“Hey.” Vernon says, shifting to face Wonwoo. He looks a lot better compared to the last time Vernon had seen him. “How did you know I was going to… y’know,” he shrugs, “summon you.”

Wonwoo freezes and it must be Vernon’s imagination because the tips of his ears turn into a pretty shade of red. 

Then he relaxes. 

“Someone has to look out for morons like you who go probing into mystical areas of craft.”

“Does everyone get one or just me?” Vernon grins. 

Wonwoo hesitates and he fidgets with the grass on the floor. “Just you.” He finally says and when he looks up, he can see the beaming glow of Vernon’s big smile. 

“That’s very nice of you.” Vernon comments. 

Wonwoo scoffs. “You’re very lucky.” He points out. “If it weren’t for me, you would’ve stabbed yourself in the hand in the middle of nowhere.” 

“It would’ve been just a little blood.” Vernon states. 

“Yeah but you might’ve summoned something else. Like a demon.” 

“Whaat?” Vernon leans back, surprised. His eyes are wide and his mouth is slack. “Those exist?” 

Wonwoo raises an eyebrow. “If I exist, wouldn’t the demons exist as well?” 

“What about angels?” Vernon eagerly asks. “What about those?”

“Those are real too.” Wonwoo patiently tells him. “But a few are the types who will mess around with humans like you. So don’t get your hopes up.” 

Vernon shrivels. 

“Do you?” He asks Wonwoo. “Do you mess around with humans like me?”

“I keep finding myself in those kinds of situations, yes.”

Vernon doesn’t know how a wave of jealousy overcame him but he says the first question that comes to mind anyway. “People other than me?” 

“No.” Wonwoo grimances. “Thank god. One is enough for me.”

He finds it in himself to laugh. “Does that make me special?” 

“Yes.” Wonwoo finds himself admitting. “I suppose it does.” 

“Good.” Vernon hums and he closes his eyes, enjoying the breeze. “I wish you’d visit me more often Wonwoo hyung.” 

Wonwoo hums, not giving a response. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this chapter has one of my favourite parts in it! i really liked the idea of leylines and would want to bring that concept up again in future fics, also i love the ant part


	4. Still Twenty

A normal person would probably scream.

A normal person would probably faint.

Vernon smiles. 

“You’re back!” He greets as if it were totally normal for a grim reaper to hang around his kitchen. “Hey!” 

“I found you dead.” Wonwoo frowns and doesn’t greet him back but he doesn’t really care. “But then I saw your chest move and you made weird sounds so I decided to sit on your bed.”

“I was sleeping. I wasn’t dead.” He tells Wonwoo with amusement. It made Vernon feel surprised that Wonwoo had gone all  _ Edward Cullen  _ and watched him sleep but it was also kind of flattering.

Wonwoo ignores him and continues to talk. “But then I got bored of looking at you so I thought I’d sit out here. To watch the moving shapes.” 

“You mean the cars?” Vernon snickers. He reaches up for a glass and looks back at Wonwoo. “Want some water?” 

Wonwoo hesitates. “I’ve never had that.” 

“You wanna try?” 

He takes Wonwoo’s shrug as an answer and grabs two glasses, fills the kettle up and waits for it to boil. 

“So you’ve never had water huh?” Vernon leans against the counter and he’s never seen Wonwoo look so nervous before. Expect he’s only seen Wonwoo like, three times so it wouldn’t be fair to judge him just on those instances alone. 

Wonwoo’s face snaps back to face Vernon. He was busy gazing out the window. “They don’t really have buffets in the underworld.” Wonwoo muses as if Vernon were dumb. “I kind of just… feed off energy.” 

“Ooh.” Vernon leans forward. “What kind of energy.” 

“This and that.” Wonwoo dodges the question. “Why do  _ you  _ drink water?” 

It’s kind of cute to watch Wonwoo suffer to try to make conversation but it warms Vernon to his toes so he doesn’t tease. 

“I need to drink water.” Vernon tells him. “If I don’t, I’ll die.” 

“Is water hard to get?” 

“No.” Vernon says, then he reconsiders. “Well it shouldn’t be. Some people don’t have access to clean water which sucks. Some people have to walk for  _ ages  _ till they find water.” 

“Well… that doesn’t sound fair.” Wonwoo frowns. 

Vernon agrees. “Yeah, it isn’t.” 

The kettle clicks off and Vernon pours the steaming water into a mug and hands it to Wonwoo. 

Wonwoo winces. “It’s hot.” He comments. 

“That’s ‘cause I just boiled it.” 

“It’s too hot though.” Wonwoo whines. 

Vernon laughs. “You don’t have to drink it now. It’ll cool down in a bit.” 

“Ah.” Wonwoo says as if Vernon had just answered all his questions about the universe. 

Vernon hums and brings his own mug to his lips. 

He sips slowly, blowing on its surface. Wonwoo watches. 

“You didn’t answer my question before.”

Vernon’s voice jerks Wonwoo out of his daze. He holds back a giggle. 

“What was it?” 

“How you feed. Like, how I drink water to survive, you said you feed of energy.”

Wonwoo looks guarded. “Everyone needs to feed off something don’t they?” 

“True.” Vernon leans forward. “But I’m curious on what  _ you  _ feed off of.”

“Why?” Wonwoo asks stupidly. 

Vernon rolls his eyes. “Because we’re  _ friends  _ and  _ friends  _ know these kinds of stuff about each other.” 

“Friends.” Wonwoo repeats as if it were a foreign thing in his mouth. 

Vernon nods. 

Wonwoo hesitates as he thinks of how he could respond. Vernon could see it in his face. “You don’t have to-”

“Grief.” 

Vernon shuts his jaw. Wonwoo diverts his eyes. 

“Grief?” 

Wonwoo shrugs and looks down on his hands, as if suddenly interested on why he has five fingers instead of six. 

“What do you mean by grief?” 

Wonwoo shifts. “Like, how people feel bad when someone they miss die. That kind of grief.”

“Then how do you feed off of it?”

“People have a certain kind of aura. I can feel it from every being in this universe.”

“Wait…” Wonwoo waits for Vernon to completely reject him, yell at him, push him out but instead Vernon says, “are you saying there are  _ other  _ beings in this universe?” 

The gobsmacked expression on Vernon’s face is enough to force a breath of laughter out of Wonwoo until his eyes are squeezed tightly shut from laughing. 

“I tell you,” Wonwoo chortles. “That I feed of the grief of others and you- the first thing you think about are  _ aliens _ ?!” 

“H-How else am I supposed to react?! You just told me there are other  _ beings _ .” Vernon pulls on his hair. “Oh my god, aliens.”

“Has it ever crossed your mind that I could be referring to animals instead?” Wonwoo suggests. 

Vernon sags. “No…” 

The clock ticks in the background and Wonwoo finally takes a drink at the water Vernon gave him. 

“This tastes like nothing.” Wonwoo comments. 

“Yeah, it tends to taste like that.” 

Wonwoo hums. Vernon sulks. 

“I know I said I could have been referring to animals, but I haven’t denied anything about extraterrestrial life forms.” 

Vernon screeches. “Don’t tease me like that hyung!” 

“Ha! I’m not! Just being truthful.” 

Vernon pouts and takes another sip, playfully glaring down at Wonwoo. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> it's public holiday so i'm posting this! i have another fic im currently writing, around the same length as this one and it's a soonchan fic! 
> 
> let me know what you think about this chapter!


	5. Twenty Three

It starts to become a comfortable routine. 

Vernon would eagerly wait in between the moments when he was alone for Wonwoo to visit him again. It might be slightly unhealthy to have such a dependence on someone like the  _ grim reaper,  _ but it works and everyone’s happy. 

So when Wonwoo doesn’t show up for three days, a week, two weeks… Vernon gets worried. He almost considers trying to sacrifice an offering at the ley lines again. 

“What is it Vernon?” Seungkwan frowns in the middle of a hip cafe and Vernon doesn’t meet his eyes because he  _ promised  _ Wonwoo he wouldn’t tell. 

He figures out what to say eventually. “Oh nothing.” He manages to say. “Just stressed.” He shrugs with an air of falseness. 

Seungkwan’s frown only deepens and he sucks thoughtfully on his iced latte. 

“You’re lying.” Seungkwan’s eyes narrow just as Vernon thinks he’s dodged the bullet. “Don’t try lying to me Hansol Vernon Chwe. I know you well enough to know when you’re upset about something.” 

“I-“ The words dry on the tip of his tongue. “Yeah, I am upset.” He settles for saying. “But I can’t tell you why.” 

As Vernon curls in on himself, Seungkwan seethes in a friendly manner that comes with the package of being Seungkwan’s friend. 

“You can’t  _ tell  _ me?! Can’t tell me.” Seungkwan scoffs. “Since when do we keep secrets.” 

“We don’t… but… this is different okay?” Vernon pleads. 

“Oh my god. I know why.” Seungkwan gasps. Vernon tenses and he watches Seungkwan nervously as his friend points an accusing finger at him. 

Vernon squeezes his eyes shut. There’s no way Seungkwan could know about Wonwoo- no way at all. But Seungkwan is Seungkwan and Vernon knows well enough that Seungkwan will eventually find out. Just like how he found out that Vernon was secretly meeting up with Jihoon hyung (Seungkwan’s boss) and was making out with him in the storage rooms during his breaks. 

So he braces himself and yells out- much too inappropriately loud- “Yes okay I miss someone!” 

Sadly, it’s the same time Seungkwan shouts- “You’re fucking my boss again!” 

There’s an awkward silence that resonates through the cafe and they realise that they’re not home in the comfort of their privacy and Seungkwan coughs and bows apologetically to their audience. 

Vernon’s ears are blood red. 

“Look I’m not fu- _ seeing  _ Jihoon hyung.” Vernon hisses, leaning forwards on their table. 

Seungkwan sighs, hand on his chest. “You bet your ass you’re not. I’m trying to get a promotion and if you and Jihoon-si are on bad terms, I wouldn’t know what to do.” 

“You don’t have to worry about that.” Vernon assures him. “It’s not Jihoon-hyung, I swear.” 

“Good.” Seungkwan flashes him a smile. “So who is it? Who’s been making my Vernonie depressed?” 

Vernon wrinkles his nose at Seungkwan’s unwanted aegyo. “Just some guy.” He fiddles with the napkin on the table. “I haven’t seen him in a while…” 

“Of course it’ll be some guy. Listen, if he’s not texting you back, just text me his address and I’ll come and yell at him for you.” 

Vernon laughs, weight lifting off his shoulders. “No don’t, it’s hard to get in contact with the guy, it’s not his fault.” 

“You’re too soft.” Seungkwan says as if he were jealous. “Tell me about him.” 

“Well he’s taller than me but not by that much.” Vernon starts saying. “And he has black hair and his face is longer than mine. His nose kind of reminds me of a fox and when I showed him a picture he thought so too.” 

“You had to show him a picture?” Seungkwan’s eyebrow raises. “Who is this guy?” 

“He’s…” Vernon struggles to find the words. “... Different. But a good different.” 

“And you haven’t seen him?” 

“Well I’ve been seeing him for a  _ really  _ long time and he usually shows up when I’m about to watch a movie- but I’ve been watching tons of movies and he’s not showing up!” 

“Do you  _ invite  _ him to watch the movie?” 

“He kind of just knows.” Vernon sighs and rubs his face. “But I haven’t seen him for like, two weeks so I’m a bit anxious.” 

“Maybe he’s busy working. Has he texted?” 

Vernon groans. “He doesn’t have a phone… I  _ told  _ him to get one and he won’t because he doesn’t believe in it.” 

“Who the fuck doesn’t believe in phones?” Seungkwan exclaims. “You’re acting like he knows nothing about technology and the- the internet even!” 

Vernon looks bashfully at Seungkwan and shrugs as Seungkwan stares at him. 

“What the  _ fuck  _ Vernon. Please tell me this dude isn’t some hippie you randomly found, please.” 

“He’s not!” Vernon says defensively. “He’s just- I told you he’s different.” 

“I’m thinking your definition of different is completely different from  _ my  _ definition of different.” 

“Probably.” Vernon agrees. “But I guess there’s nothing I can really do but wait.” 

“Well, you could lure him out?” Seungkwan says suggestively and Vernon blushes. 

“I- He-“ Vernon stutters. “I don’t think he sees me like that.” 

“Well then make him.” Seungkwan rolls his eyes. “Or at least plant the idea that it isn’t impossible for him to see you as y’know… something else.” 

“I wouldn’t even know  _ how  _ to.” 

“Wear something cute under those sweatpants of yours and make sure he gets a peek.” Seungkwan tells Vernon. “That worked with me and Soonyoung hyung.” 

“Gross.” 

“Just a suggestion.” Seungkwan reassures him. “If you just want to watch movies and cuddle that’s cute too.” 

Vernon tosses a scrunched up napkin at Seungkwan. “Shut up.” He laughs. “I’m not PG-13.” 

“Could’ve fooled me.” Seungkwan smirks. 

When Vernon comes back home, he throws his keys on the counter and kicks his shoes off. He walks over to his laptop, left on the couch and types in “ _ lingerie buy online”.  _

He bites his lip as he clicks on the first link that comes up and adverts his eyes with shock as he comes face to face with titties. 

“Oh my god oh my god, why,  _ why  _ am i doing this?” Vernon whispers to himself. 

His cursor moves to the lingerie section and he grits his teeth when he selects the  _ panties  _ section. 

It’s a mess. 

He’s a mess. 

There’s lacy panties, ones with straps at the back and ones with  _ no back at all _ and Vernon’s wondering how would he ever wear one of these if he can’t even look at them on the site. 

It takes him a while to collect himself and he takes in a deep breath. 

“Not PG-13.” He tells himself.

Several more traumatising choices later, he settles on a couple. He thinks he should buy at least a couple  _ just in case. _ Definitely not because it makes his skin tingle in anticipation. 

Since when was it a crime to want to look pretty?

He looks at his cart, deliberating. His wallet cries. He clicks checkout, enters his address and the site tells him it’ll arrive the next day. 

It’s over. All he can do is wait for his package… and for Wonwoo. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> congrats to seventeen and carats for 4th left and right win! im so proud of us! 
> 
> also this chapter is almost 90% complete foolery, i remember being stuck and lingerie seemed like a good direction to head in, tell me what you think!


	6. Twenty-three and Mission Abort

Vernon wears his newly bought items. It would be a shame to waste them anyway, considering how much he spent on them. 

Because of this, he’s extremely aware of his undergarments and how  _ low  _ he wears his jeans and that he should probably consider wearing a belt. 

But Wonwoo doesn’t show up. 

It’s expected at this point, Vernon believes the grim reaper must’ve kept swept up by guiding spirits in the direction of the Underworld or simply discussing whether or not staying for unfinished business would be a good idea. 

Vernon never really did believe in ghosts before Wonwoo told him about them. Which is ironic if you were friends with the Grim Reaper. 

He could picture Wonwoo and a ghostly shimmering silver figure having a chat, talking about spiritual things that Vernon would have trouble even fathoming. 

Perhaps, that’s why Wonwoo hasn’t been visiting. He had simply grown  _ bored  _ of Vernon. 

He drags himself out of bed to go to work, trying to ignore the deep gnawing feeling of disappointment. It’ll be another day of waiting for nothing. Wonwoo probably wasn’t ever interested in coming to see Vernon anyway. 

It’s when he’s sulking on the sofa, dressed in a shirt Wonwoo wore that one time and his stupid panties, does he regret everything?

“What is this?” Wonwoo asks. 

Vernon jumps so high that his heart skyrockets to the ceiling and he clutches his chest. “Shit!” he curses, glaring at Wonwoo. 

He can tell Wonwoo tries to hold back a grin threatening to spread across his face, “Well?” The Grim Reaper asks. “I can smell your awful rancid sadness from miles away.” 

“Where were you?” Vernon demands, his shirt rises dangerously up his thigh and as large as it is, he has to be careful of accidentally flashing Wonwoo. 

Wonwoo strolls around his living room, far too familiar with everything and it makes Vernon’s morning coffee feel a lot more bitter than it was. “I was working.” Wonwoo finally tells him. “Why?” He arches his eyebrow delicately. “Did you miss me?” 

Vernon scoffs, ignoring the large lump formed in his throat. “Of course not. Who do you take me as?” 

Wonwoo shrugs and then tosses himself onto the sofa. Right. Next. To. Vernon. 

Danger alarms blare in his head and he tries his best to shuffle away from the Grim Reaper. Mission abort. Mission abort. 

“So- uh, did you have a good trip then?” Vernon nervously asks. 

“I wouldn’t call travelling around the world picking up lost souls to be a  _ trip _ .” If Vernon didn’t know Wonwoo so well, he would’ve mistaken his behaviour to be arrogant. “You’d think I wouldn’t want to chill,” he pauses to taste the unfamiliar word on his lips, another slang or lingo that Vernon had taught him. “With you?” He ends. 

Vernon’s lungs stop functioning for a while. Wonwoo looks into his eyes and he can’t seem to draw his own away. “I’ve-I’ve, I’ve been waiting to chill but you’ve never turned up. I was starting to think you were gonna ditch me.” 

Vernon crosses his arms and pouts. Wonwoo leans over, his hand supporting his body, too close to Vernon’s thigh and Wonwoo stares up at him. His face is dead, which is ironic but his eyes sparkle with mischief. “Is that so?” Wonwoo drawls and Vernon suddenly feels extremely self conscious. He can feel the lace against his hip bones and it burnt like iron against a fire. 

“Yeah.” Vernon croaks. 

Wonwoo hovers over him for a bit, quirks his eyebrow and leans back. Vernon slumps, the tension draining from his skin. 

“Well, I wouldn’t do that.” Wonwoo says flippantly. “So you can forget about that.” There’s a sharp edge behind his smooth voice and there’s a spark in Vernon’s heart. “Don’t be so stupid.” The spark leaves Vernon as the regular,  _ comfortable  _ and normal Wonwoo comes back. 

“Of course not.” Vernon says, his lip curling upwards. “I could never be as stupid as to even be stupid.” 

He stares straight down at Wonwoo, the Grim Reaper furrowing in confusion at Vernon’s choice of words. “You don’t make sense.” Wonwoo finally comes to the conclusion. “Why do you need to constantly confuse me Vernonie?” 

Vernon laughs when Wonwoo playfully pokes him on the side with his finger and he jerks to shield himself. “Not my fault that you’re the stupid one between us.”

“Yah!” Wonwoo exclaims with faux anger. “Respect your elder.” 

Vernon catches his breath. “Sorry Uncle.” He giggles and Wonwoo pounces onto Vernon, forcing him into a headlock. 

Wonwoo growls and chuckles sadistically as Vernon grabbles helplessly at Wonwoo’s hold. 

“You’re killing me!” Vernon cries dramatically. “I’m dying!” He moans. 

Wonwoo chuffs. “Stop being so dramatic.” He pushes Vernon away from him and pauses. “What is this new article of clothing?” Wonwoo asks and a bucket of icy cold fear drenches Vernon. “This looks different from the  _ boxers  _ you’ve introduced me to.” 

Vernon can’t bring himself to say a word. He opens and shuts his mouth like a broken robot as Wonwoo rambles. 

“These look so much better.” Wonwoo says to himself. “Why don’t the ones you gave me have those spiderwebs?” 

That breaks Vernon out of panic. “Spiderwebs?” He utters. “What do you mean oh- okay, you’re touching me now that’s… completely fine!” Vernon squeaks when Wonwoo decides to reach out to Vernon’s hips where the lacy outline of the panties plaster to his body. 

“These patterns.” Wonwoo tells Vernon, tracing the lacy material. “It’s very nice.” 

“Is that a good thing?” 

Vernon can feel Wonwoo rolling his eyes at him. “How is it not? I just mentioned that it’s nice.” 

“Yeah.” Vernon laughs nervously. “Right.” 

“I want these.” Wonwoo says, jealous. He leans back. “Can you get me some?” 

“I…” Vernon is confused. “If you want, I guess I could. But-” Vernon clears his throat. “That’s not why I bought these.” 

“Then why are you wearing them? If you didn’t buy them to be worn?” 

“What? No.” Vernon shakes his head. “I, I bought them  _ for  _ you, to like- I dunno. Impress you?” 

Vernon is sure he’s as bright as red traffic lights.

Wonwoo frowns. “Why are you wearing them if they’re for me?” 

Vernon makes a strangled sound. This was harder than he expected. “I bought them because… I thought you’d like how they look on me.” He finishes the last part of the sentences quietly and shyly. His head is tucked under his chin and he’s pulling his shirt down over his knees self consciously. 

“I don’t understand.” 

“It’s fine.” Vernon says. He doesn’t dare look back at Wonwoo. He felt humiliated.

“No.” Wonwoo says rather sternly. “ _ Please _ help me understand.”

Vernon separates himself from Wonwoo, and looks down at his fingers. He really didn’t think this through. He can’t help but to sigh heavily and he tenses when Wonwoo places his hand on his thigh. 

He gulps, and slowly looks up. 

“Please?” Wonwoo asks softly, as if he can tell Vernon feels like he wants to dig his own grave. 

“O-okay. Right. Uh.” Vernon shuffles a bit into the sofa, and he tugs the shirt down. Though, Wonwoo swats his hand away and continues to trace the different lace patterns on his hip bones. It makes Vernon stutter even more. “Look, I can’t concentrate with you- with you touching me like that!” 

“What do you mean? This is distracting you?” Wonwoo mutters. “Humans are so weird.”

Vernon wants to scream. “It just- feels, tingly and I can’t think straight right now.” 

“Okay.” Wonwoo frowns with confusion. 

“Right.” Vernon releases a breath. “So, I wore these, because… I thought you would like the way I look in them.” He says, rushed and quick. 

“But you don’t even let me touch.” Wonwoo counters back. “How does any of this make sense?” 

“No, I-, you  _ can  _ touch, but like, it’s nice if you ask permission first, y’know?” Vernon blushes. 

Wonwoo squints at Vernon. “Okay.” He drawls, not quite understanding why Vernon was being so nervous and serious. “Can I touch you, Vernonie?” 

“Uhm…” Vernon’s brain fries, because nothing could prepare him from hearing Wonwoo say  _ that _ . 

“Hello?” Wonwoo waves a hand in front of Vernon’s eyes. 

He jumps. “Yeah.” He squeaks. “Yeah.”

“Okay.” Wonwoo smiles at him and Vernon feels as if his heart was about to pound out of his chest and land on the floor. 

Wonwoo lifts his shirt up, just the side of it, so he could continue admiring the patterns of lace.

Vernon is sitting frozen in his seat. He doesn’t dare breathe. 

“Why are you so still?” Wonwoo asks him with a relaxed drawl. 

Vernon glances at Wonwoo and then snaps his gaze back forward. “Oh, cause, I never thought past this.” He gestures between them. 

“Why didn’t you?” Wonwoo decides to seep a finger past his waistband to rub the lace between his fingers. 

Vernon squirms. “Your hands are cold.” He comments instead. 

“Why didn’t you?” Wonwoo repeats. 

“Because I didn’t think you’d be back?” Vernon finally admits. It’s enough to make Wonwoo stop his ministrations on his panties. “I’m sorry!” Vernon rushes to say. “It’s just- It was kind of just like a desperate purchase and I thought it’d make you notice me more” He groans. “It’s kind of stupid.” 

“Didn’t we just talk about how you weren’t stupid?” Wonwoo lightly teases. “And besides, you know you don’t need to wear pretty things for me. I’m not aware of this human tradition and I don’t completely understand, but I’ve always noticed you.”

“But I wanted you to notice me in a different way.” Vernon confesses. He might as well go all the way now right? “In a… sexier way.” He whispers the last part, hoping Wonwoo wouldn’t hear. 

Wonwoo does. His hearing is amazing. It’s so unfair.

“Sexier? What does that even mean?” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> we're almost done! i hope everyone has enjoyed the fic so far!


	7. Sexy and Twenty-Three

Vernon was speechless. Actually. Vernon wasn’t sure if he could take any of this before. He’s already humiliated himself beyond no return and now that Wonwoo had  _ asked  _ him what he meant by  _ ‘sexier _ ’ he wasn’t sure how to respond. 

“What?” Vernon choked on his saliva. “What did you ask?”

Wonwoo huffs. There’s a twinge of pink on the apples of his pale cheeks. The first time Vernon had ever seen him blush. 

“Sexier.” Wonwoo repeats. “I asked you if you knew what it meant.”

Vernon scratches his hair. “Yeah, I know what it means.” He says. “Do- do you?” 

“No.” Wonwoo says. “Why would I ask if I already knew?” 

Vernon shrugs. Then an idea comes to him. 

“I know! You can search it up on my phone!” 

Wonwoo stares at him questioningly. “Why can’t you just tell me?” 

Vernon, pleased that he’s found an alternative method that  _ did not  _ include him stumbling over his words, ignored him. 

“Here.” Vernon shoves his phone into Wonwoo’s lap. “This is what sexy means.” 

_ Sexy, adjective _

_ Very exciting or appealing. _

Wonwoo reads. That seems correct. 

“I don’t understand. That is how I feel right now.” 

“What?” 

Wonwoo gives Vernon back his phone. “Well, didn’t you say you wanted me to look at you in a  _ sexier  _ way? I already do. So you can stop being so sad now.”

“You do?!” Vernon almost yells. He almost never raises his voice. Wonwoo winces. “You do?” Vernon repeats, quieter. 

“Well it said that it meant  _ very exciting _ .” Wonwoo explains. “And I do find you very exciting. It also says that sexy means appealing. I wouldn’t be hanging out with you if I didn’t find you appealing.”

Vernon groans. Wonwoo clearly doesn’t understand. 

“No…” He whines. “That’s not what I mean.”

“Then I’m confused.” Wonwoo tells him. “What do  _ you  _ want it to mean?” 

“What do  _ I _ want it to mean?” Vernon repeats, muttering. “What  _ do  _ I want it to mean?” 

“I already told you, you look nice. I can also tell you you’re pretty. But I wasn’t sure how you would handle receiving compliments, since our relationship doesn’t often consist of compliments.”

“Wha-?” Vernon says disbelievingly. “I always compliment you!” 

“I didn’t realise.” 

“Oh my god.” 

Wonwoo grumbles. “Can you please tell me what you’re thinking, Vernon?” 

Vernon takes in a deep breath. “When I said I wanted you to notice me in asexier way, I meant like, you’d want to like me in a different way, y’know. In like a  _ non-platonic  _ type of way.”

“What does non-platonic mean?” Wonwoo asks. 

Vernon’s practically given up now. He has shredded his dignity, has owned up to his self-inflicted humiliation, might as well drive Wonwoo away completely. “It means I don’t want you and I to just be friends anymore.” Vernon confesses. “It means, I- I want more.” 

“That sounds selfish.” Wonwoo snarks. 

Vernon makes a dismissive noise. “I made it sound that way, but if the other person wants more as well, it’s not selfish… It’s almost selfless.” 

“Interesting.” Wonwoo had taken interest in fidgeting with Vernon’s panties again. It makes Vernon overly conscious of the stupid decision he had made. If only he didn’t. Then he wouldn’t be having this conversation with Wonwoo at this moment.

There’s a silence and Vernon thinks it’s never been so quiet ever before. He could hear his heart beating and his blood rushing. 

“You know what? It’s fine. You probably don’t feel the same way. I have more panties. I can give them to you if you want, that’s fine with me. Not this one though. I like this one.” 

“Vernon.” Wonwoo’s low voice rumbles. “Please will you let me say this?” 

Vernon gulps and finally, finally focuses his attention onto Wonwoo. He looks paler than he usually does and skinnier too. Vernon would need to feed Wonwoo properly before he leaves again. 

“Vernon.” Wonwoo starts to speak. “You know I care about you a lot right?” Vernon nods. “Sometimes, when I finish sending a soul off, I would see other people. And sometimes, I see people holding hands. I also-”

“Wonwoo holding hands can be done platonically too.” Vernon interrupts. “Sorry.” He says when he realises he’s cut Wonwoo off again. 

“I  _ also _ see people touch mouths.” Wonwoo continues, strongly, much stronger than Vernon could ever speak. “And sometimes they sit in the same seat, even though there is enough space for both of them. I can  _ feel  _ their souls. I can feel their essence. And even though I can’t feel ours. It’s what I hope it would be.”

“What, what do you mean?” Vernon’s mouth feels dry. “What are you trying to say to me?” 

Wonwoo lets out a chuckle that sends a shiver down Vernon’s spine. He’s aware of Wonwoo’s arm that comes to circle round his shoulders. “It means a lot more than just thinking you’re sexy Vernonie.” He breathes. “Never, have I had the urge to look for relationships like that. I thought I was  _ weird _ . No one from the underworld has time for such time-consuming things.”

Vernon can feel Wonwoo’s breath against his neck. He can feel Wonwoo’s fingers stroking his hair softly. He can feel everything all in one go. “I- I don’t think it’s time consuming.” He murmurs, bravely scooching closer to Wonwoo’s side. “At least not with you.” 

“That is nice to hear.” Wonwoo hums. “I was frightened that you would never want to spend that type of time with me. The time consuming type. I am, after all, the grim reaper.”

“Does it look like that has stopped me?” Vernon says. “I couldn’t care less.”

“I was still scared.” 

Vernon pushes himself up to face Wonwoo directly. “Don’t be.” Vernon whispers. His eyes dart down to Wonwoo’s lips. Should he kiss him? Would that be too forward? Did Wonwoo actually want-

Wonwoo kisses him. They bump noses at first and Vernon lets out an undignified squeak. Wonwoo’s hand cradles the back of Vernon’s neck as they find their pace. It’s slow and sweet and perfect. 

“I’m glad you don’t find me sexy.” Vernon confesses against Wonwoo’s lips. “This is so much better.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thanks to everyone who stuck with this fic till the end!

**Author's Note:**

> Don't worry about slow updates with this one, I started it last year and kept going back to it every few months. I'm finally posting it! 
> 
> Please support the black lives matter movement by signing this petition if you haven't already: https://secure.actblue.com/donate/2004_email_blacklivesmatter_racialdata_up?refcode=widget&noskip=true


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